Dear Remy -
Yes, it's another letter to you, that everyone else can read.
You married me today. It seems fair to give you your own entry.
People are being very strange. They are acting as though they're surprised, or even shocked. I don't understand why. It was always you, from the moment I met you, with your demanding, cute, noob ways. Demanding is the wrong word, it sounds like a negative thing. Do you know that one of the ways you won me was that way you had of tping me, as soon as you or I logged on? I liked your confidence. I still do.
I like that you've maintained your integrity, and your sense of self, throughout your journey through this second life. I like that you keep a weather eye on reality, and that you remind me where it is. I like that you are always brutally honest, and still charming as hell. I like how you know me so thoroughly that I can never rattle you ... and that I know you so well that I know when I have.
I do adore thee, Remy de las Lanzas. If partnering someone in Second Life is simply, as it seems to me to be, a statement that one's loyalty is publicly aligned to another, then you are it, and you have mine.
much love
Mrs Fretwerk
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Beautiful Freaks performance - Crow Garden
A few weeks ago, as we were preparing to re-open The Beautiful Freaks Burlesque Circus on the Viva La Glam sim, I logged on to receive a landmark from Ludo Sabetha. Ludo has a wonderful eye for beauty in all it's forms. Off I went to alpha.tribe, and of course, my muse awoke.
The costume is actually called "moth", but to me it spoke bird. The act is called "Crow Garden", and is set to "The Garden", by John Foxx. I used a poem from the much-maligned poet laureate, Ted Hughes (he was Sylvia Plath's husband)
A Childish Prank
Man's and woman's bodies lay without souls,
The costume is actually called "moth", but to me it spoke bird. The act is called "Crow Garden", and is set to "The Garden", by John Foxx. I used a poem from the much-maligned poet laureate, Ted Hughes (he was Sylvia Plath's husband)
A Childish Prank
Man's and woman's bodies lay without souls,
Dully gaping, foolishly staring, inert
On the flowers of Eden.
God pondered.
The problem was so great, it dragged him asleep.
Crow laughed.
He bit the Worm, God's only son,
Into two writhing halves.
He stuffed into man the tail half
With the wounded end hanging out.
He stuffed the head half headfirst into woman
And it crept in deeper and up
To peer out through her eyes
Calling it's tail-half to join up quickly, quickly
Because O it was painful.
Man awoke being dragged across the grass.
Woman awoke to see him coming.
Neither knew what had happened.
God went on sleeping.
Crow went on laughing.
I think the poem has a witty insight into male-female relationships. Without the sex organs, man and woman are soulless and dull. Crow "enlivens" them by creating an unquenchable yearning. It's delicious and dark, and, I think, works well for The Beautiful Freaks"It's like she's smiling"
I am interested in the way time passes. Things happen fast in my Second Life, and I know from observation it is the same all over.
When you are nursing a broken heart, it feels like it will never end. I have seen this, and I have seen people stunned because they are nursing their own pain while they watch a former partner move on. Part of the hurt seems to be that the other recovered so quickly.
Of course, sometimes a thing is just wrong, and not "meant to be". To my mind, it's still preferable to bring it to a close without deception; it's hard to say to someone "look, it's not you, it's us", but congratulations if you are one of the ones who can. If you're one of the ones who can't be alone, and who have their next lined up before the first even knows they're packing, then shame on you. And yes, I'm advised it's human nature, but shame nonetheless.
That said, I gained a great deal from my dip in the shark pool. Not least of my rewards was a sharp insight into what it is that I am seeking. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't have fun.
But, honey, I'm home. I know you read this, and are probably wincing right now. Thank you for being there when I got back, thank you for being every shade of cool.
And yep, I'm aware that my posts are oblique. I do that to preserve the privacy of others. If you know me, then you know all the gory details, anyway. Cus that's how I roll ;-P
When you are nursing a broken heart, it feels like it will never end. I have seen this, and I have seen people stunned because they are nursing their own pain while they watch a former partner move on. Part of the hurt seems to be that the other recovered so quickly.
Of course, sometimes a thing is just wrong, and not "meant to be". To my mind, it's still preferable to bring it to a close without deception; it's hard to say to someone "look, it's not you, it's us", but congratulations if you are one of the ones who can. If you're one of the ones who can't be alone, and who have their next lined up before the first even knows they're packing, then shame on you. And yes, I'm advised it's human nature, but shame nonetheless.
That said, I gained a great deal from my dip in the shark pool. Not least of my rewards was a sharp insight into what it is that I am seeking. And I'd be lying if I said I didn't have fun.
But, honey, I'm home. I know you read this, and are probably wincing right now. Thank you for being there when I got back, thank you for being every shade of cool.
And yep, I'm aware that my posts are oblique. I do that to preserve the privacy of others. If you know me, then you know all the gory details, anyway. Cus that's how I roll ;-P
Saturday, June 5, 2010
grace
I had envisioned using the rest of Else Barnard's photos to tell a little more of things from my perspective, using Else's work to provide eye candy.
But this is too beautiful. Thank you Else. All grace is yours xx
But this is too beautiful. Thank you Else. All grace is yours xx
leading by example
My friends are awesomely clever, did I mention it? I spent a little time with my favourite pyro, Else Barnard, and this is (I hope) the first of what she did to me.
Else has done other pictures of me, and one thing I love is her use of light. There's an almost otherworldliness to it, or maybe a "vintage" feel. Any time I spend with else feels a little vintage - which is odd, since anyone who knows her arsenal knows she's a thoroughly modern girl ;-D
After all the sighing of the past couple of months, I was looking to recapture a sense of my normal assertiveness. This is the chry who knows what you're up to, and is comfortable she can handle it. For the four of you who read this blog and know me well, I swear, she's making a comeback.
As always, the skin is by Nena Janus of League. The outfit is by Graves (sorry, but any other latex simply is not as good) and the tattoo is a custom work by Ellie Criss of Sharkey's Tattoos (omg <3 Ellie xxx)). The hair is Charlie, from Twisted and Spoiled, and as always, the eyes are from devious minds.
Else has done other pictures of me, and one thing I love is her use of light. There's an almost otherworldliness to it, or maybe a "vintage" feel. Any time I spend with else feels a little vintage - which is odd, since anyone who knows her arsenal knows she's a thoroughly modern girl ;-D
After all the sighing of the past couple of months, I was looking to recapture a sense of my normal assertiveness. This is the chry who knows what you're up to, and is comfortable she can handle it. For the four of you who read this blog and know me well, I swear, she's making a comeback.
As always, the skin is by Nena Janus of League. The outfit is by Graves (sorry, but any other latex simply is not as good) and the tattoo is a custom work by Ellie Criss of Sharkey's Tattoos (omg <3 Ellie xxx)). The hair is Charlie, from Twisted and Spoiled, and as always, the eyes are from devious minds.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Regrets, I've had a few ...
I am a creature of impulse, it's unfortunate, but true.
Recently, I have made bad decisions, and they have been decisions which have hurt other people. I let expert flattery go to my head and cause me to be less mindful than I prefer to be. I fell into the shallow pool. See ... my Second Life has been very protected. I am treated with love and respect by both my friends and my fans. Yes, I've heard the stories, who hasn't? But I guess I thought I was so adorable the usual rules did not apply.
But Second Life moves fast, and my karma caught up with me quickly. In other crowds, love and respect are not the usual currency. And flattery is easy. You could say I found the shallow pool filled with sharks (god knows, I have, many times). And (cue violins) now I get to play out that same old story ("all men in SL are sluts or vagrants" etc etc).
I believe karma works like this: If you're a lousy human, as time goes on, you'll find yourself surrounded only by lousy humans, and everything you have done will be done to you, because that's what lousy humans do. I try not to be a lousy human.
I'm out of the pool, and I'll live. I regret being so impulsive and absolutely being so shallow. But there's been a lot of regret so far this year, n'est pas? I promise to do better. Especially by those of you who have always done well by me. And I promise to make happy posts, and maybe more of them. Ehhh ... I promise to try.
chry xx
Recently, I have made bad decisions, and they have been decisions which have hurt other people. I let expert flattery go to my head and cause me to be less mindful than I prefer to be. I fell into the shallow pool. See ... my Second Life has been very protected. I am treated with love and respect by both my friends and my fans. Yes, I've heard the stories, who hasn't? But I guess I thought I was so adorable the usual rules did not apply.
But Second Life moves fast, and my karma caught up with me quickly. In other crowds, love and respect are not the usual currency. And flattery is easy. You could say I found the shallow pool filled with sharks (god knows, I have, many times). And (cue violins) now I get to play out that same old story ("all men in SL are sluts or vagrants" etc etc).
I believe karma works like this: If you're a lousy human, as time goes on, you'll find yourself surrounded only by lousy humans, and everything you have done will be done to you, because that's what lousy humans do. I try not to be a lousy human.
I'm out of the pool, and I'll live. I regret being so impulsive and absolutely being so shallow. But there's been a lot of regret so far this year, n'est pas? I promise to do better. Especially by those of you who have always done well by me. And I promise to make happy posts, and maybe more of them. Ehhh ... I promise to try.
chry xx
Friday, April 30, 2010
capax infiniti
Yesterday, I found a myspace account that I didn't know existed. Of course there is a blog attached to the profile, and in it the writer mentions how wonderful life is. How much it has improved since he freed himself of certain poisonous influences.
Of course, it's the blog of someone I used to be very close to. Close enough to know that I (and my virtual world) was not the only poison in his life then. But I certainly was one of them. And yes, it hurts to know that's how I showed up in the debriefing. It hurts even more to not have been invited to the debriefing, but ehhh ... I was ever a symptom, and not the disease.
I wish him well. He shaped my Second Life. He taught me what I could absorb. He showed me what was possible and influences my aesthetic decisions to this day. From him I learned to work for my Second Life, and the satisfaction of self-supporting in game.
Along with all the other poisons, I have been removed from his system. I guess I'm okay with that.
Of course, it's the blog of someone I used to be very close to. Close enough to know that I (and my virtual world) was not the only poison in his life then. But I certainly was one of them. And yes, it hurts to know that's how I showed up in the debriefing. It hurts even more to not have been invited to the debriefing, but ehhh ... I was ever a symptom, and not the disease.
I wish him well. He shaped my Second Life. He taught me what I could absorb. He showed me what was possible and influences my aesthetic decisions to this day. From him I learned to work for my Second Life, and the satisfaction of self-supporting in game.
If nothing else, I have to thank him for anime, for Corey Taylor and for the beautiful build that is Idle Rogue.
Along with all the other poisons, I have been removed from his system. I guess I'm okay with that.
Consummatum est
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